Mother’s Day Review

Mothers Day is the latest installment of the nearly extinct ‘jukebox’ film genre.

Thank God for that.

For those unaware, a jukebox film is a series of loosely interconnecting stories based around a common theme. For example: Mothers day, Valentines day, New Years eve etc.

Done well it can be amusing to see a similar tackled from several angles (Love Actually is the lone example as far as i’m aware.) More often though these films are borderline unwatchable, a collection of short stories not long enough to be made into a film but padded together and filled with enough vaguely recognized names they can be repeated on TV constantly.

And if it seems like it’s taking me a while to get to the film with that’s because there’s not too much to say about it.

The writing is awful, with the sole exception of Jennifer Aniston the people who wandered in front of the camera (I cannot bring myself to disgrace the word acting.) are awful, none of the stories have any sense of romance or originality, the pacing is awful, the tone goes from what I think is meant to be a touching/tear jerking scene to literally cutting to a ‘comedy’ scene. (Neither of which works) and the way it’s shot is among some of the worst I’ve ever seen.

Hell, even Peter Bradshaw, writing in The Guardian, gave the film one star out of five, calling it “as feel good and life-affirming as a fire in an asbestos factory neighbouring a children’s hospital.”

How Julia Roberts got roped into this I’ll never know. Did the director save her from a burning building?

This is film as a cold, mechanical marketing. Targeted like a missile on an day that is in itself the purest form of crass commercialization that I know of.

I didn’t like it.

And it’s never going to go away.

This ‘thing’ currently rated at 7% on Rotten Tomatoes, with the most memorable line of dialogue being ” The fear of death beings everyone together” is going to be on TV every Mothers Day from now until the sun expands and destroys the Earth.

It has no positive upside, nothing to recommend, no original thought or idea or moment. Every story can be guessed within 30 seconds, every ‘funny’ moment fails and each emotional moment reads like a computer trying to act like a ‘human being.’

MY SCORE: FIRE

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